Good news. I'm not wearing pants.
I know what you're thinking and that's: how could that possibly be of any benefit to you? Well, I'm not sure except for the fact that I'm really happy. I haven't been pants free for about two months and I feel like a crack addict that's jump back on the crack wagon. Oh yeah.
Nose Ring
It's been nearly a year since I got my nose pierced. It was a spur of the moment decision spurred by an equally rash act. My friend and I went shopping at the local dollar store and somehow I walked out without paying for my goods. This was a legit accident as we were trying on scarfs and I just forgot to take it off/buy it. So, like all criminals, we decided to extend our dirty, good-for-nothing behavior and get our noses pierced. Flash forward nine months and my nose started itching. Obviously, you can't really scratch a nose piercing, so I took it out and gave my skin some time off. Two days later, I attempted to stick the bad boy back in there no problemo. Reality = Not So. The little fucker had closed up and the PROCESS TO GET IT OPEN SUCKED SO BAD. I get why it's called self-mutilation; it hurts beast mode level 3456449505944. I felt the skin give way as the needle pushed through my nostril. Awful. P.S. I nearly fainted when I first got it.
Sisters
I've got two of them. We had to do some early Spring cleaning and it didn't go well. I went in my sister's room and she was chilling on the bed reading. I said "USJP what, what are you doing? How come you aren't cleaning your room?" Her response: because it's boring. I was baffled. Sometimes I forget that they're's (don't look at my grammar) a ten year age gap and the resulting disparity. It's super irritating.
Paranormal Shit
I'm still obsessed with True Blood. I wish I had HBO so that I could watch the fourth season On Demand. I dream about it (yes, about having HBO). The guys are so hot and nekkid (win!). However, the show is easily one of the more laughable/farcical series on television. Many times it crosses the ridiculous line, and often it fails in the realm of plausibility and continuity. Bon Temps marches to its own beat and I'm the lead cheerleader.
When I want to put the pom poms down, I watch
Sob Story
I wasn't really left at the altar, but I was left. Three days ago, my friend celebrated her twenty-fourth birthday. Five days ago, she sent me an email with a place and time. I didn't respond. The day of the party, I told her I wouldn't make it to the dinner, but that I could attend the festivities afterwards. On the phone, we confirmed where I was to hook-up with the party. Almost dressed to kill (because I'm lazy) I made my way over to the stated location. I told my ride to leave and I went into the restaurant. Nobody was there. I told the concierge that my phone wouldn't fit in my purse and asked if I could use the house phone. He consented. I called my friend. She told me they had switched the location. No one bothered to tell me and she told me that "we're cutting the cake and we'll be over there to get you in fifteen minutes."
Alright, that's not so bad. Except I waited for over and hour and half for someone to come get me. It was humiliating and so unbelievably embarrassing to be in that situation. I just couldn't believe that I was stranded while they were celebrating. That all my friends were partying and completely not giving a fuck about me and more than likely mocking my situation (haha, Kandy doesn't drive, have a phone, or a job, or boyfriend or etc.). I cried.
I just couldn't believe how insensitive they (like fifteen people) were and I ruined my make-up (no pictures). I don't know what to do or how to feel about it. Allz I know is that they're definitely not invited to my party on March first and I sure the fuck am not going to their's (at least any time soon). I feel a little bitchy for thinking that, but I have anxiety just thinking about hanging out with them again. Any who, what would you do? I can't even figure out what Jesus would do in such a situation.
Apples and Bananas
You know that one quote about "never fighting with an idiot because they'll just drag you down and beat you with experience?" I am currently trying WITH ALL MY MIGHT to put it to practice. Here's the 411--kind of. I'm going to use an analogy to protect the identity of the stupid.
Me: Hey person X can you got the grocery store and get me seven oranges?
Me: Cool beans playah, playah.
*Person X returns from running errands.*
Me: Okay, thanks!!
End Scene
Huh??? What the fuck are you talking about? Does the word SEVEN not have a numerical value where you come from?? What is this? Why are you allowed to breed? Please go back to whichever backwards, infested with dumb bitches planet that you came from and NEVER TALK TO ME EVER AGAIN. *throws tantrum*
