This endeavor was brought upon by a drunken stupor. Surprisingly, the fic
features woke-up married!Dhr, countless references to cartoon
characters, and a gratuitous author's note.
Title: So Near Like a Baby
Author: Me!
Rating: That's the issue. I'll slap a PG-13 on it.
Warnings: None really.
Summary:When
these conmemmics coume iout it’s over. No more pmiste rn ice giy . I
diont’ even care. Just say you’bee be ther like the spice gurls .. babye
spaice is mattered and I don’t like it one bit. Oh=hopefully harroy
pooter can siveae the dayl. I don’t know fore sure and IZ on’dlont
remmeer the issube, but jueee golhy harrrp potter will repveial .
<--prevail.
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Sunday, November 6, 2011
I have a Lovely Bunch of Coconuts
Like clockwork, it seems that I always want a cupcake. Day or night,
rain or shine, with milk and cookies. The dilemma over cupcakes concerns
my favorite part. Well, which part is that? The icing part. So sweet
and creamy and problematic. See, I have what the doctor calls "adult
on-set allergies." As I was coasting through my twenty-second year of
life, I developed a sensitivity to dairy.
*waves* good-bye cheese, milk, sour cream, cream cheese, salad dressings, yogurt, all the foods made with diary, but especially cupcakes.
Forty-five minutes ago, I ate a slice of cheesecake. It was so good. But diary interferes with iron absorption. And the doctors told me that I have anemia too. So, now I'm waiting for an hours time to take my iron supplement.
I wanted to go immediately to bed after eating my wickedly sinful slice of cheesecake. But I hadn't taken my vitamins yet, so Here I Am.
Sleepy, frustrated and rambling.
My hour is up!
*waves* good-bye cheese, milk, sour cream, cream cheese, salad dressings, yogurt, all the foods made with diary, but especially cupcakes.
Forty-five minutes ago, I ate a slice of cheesecake. It was so good. But diary interferes with iron absorption. And the doctors told me that I have anemia too. So, now I'm waiting for an hours time to take my iron supplement.
I wanted to go immediately to bed after eating my wickedly sinful slice of cheesecake. But I hadn't taken my vitamins yet, so Here I Am.
Sleepy, frustrated and rambling.
My hour is up!
Friday, October 28, 2011
Belligerency
I am on—an edge, rather at a crossroad.
The place that I come from is wonderful
The place where I may go to is wondrous
or perhaps wander-ous.
trapped in caravans, contained in
silk, bells about their feet. Tintinnabulation.
Everywhere they go, they bring, music
processional
music.
In a line; predictable in order: 1, 2, 3.
Until they reach my crossroad
beckoning with unrestraint
completely unrestraint.
free. wild. extravagant. feral. abandon. nomadic.
without a Home.
Gypsies come to where I stand.
The location of my existence
To release me from the tedium of ordinary existence.
But from where I stand, the view I see
this place that I come from is
Pull a shawl around me.
Pander around my room, wishing for tea.
Pose as my personal fairy godmother.
Put on some tea.
Push through the last 1, 2, 3 pages.
Drifting from this wonderful place into
Sleep.
at times rejecting its challenge
at other times not.
Surpassing that which can be wonderful for that which is wondrous.
Gypsies’ bells
in no given order.
Stretched
Distilled
Filled
Matured
Committed
Washed and made whole.
I am at a crossroad.
A bell rings.
Round One.
The place that I come from is wonderful
The place where I may go to is wondrous
or perhaps wander-ous.
trapped in caravans, contained in
silk, bells about their feet. Tintinnabulation.
Everywhere they go, they bring, music
processional
music.
In a line; predictable in order: 1, 2, 3.
Until they reach my crossroad
beckoning with unrestraint
completely unrestraint.
free. wild. extravagant. feral. abandon. nomadic.
without a Home.
Gypsies come to where I stand.
The location of my existence
To release me from the tedium of ordinary existence.
But from where I stand, the view I see
this place that I come from is
- My yoke is light. My days bright.
- And my nights…dark of course.
- sometimes starry. Other times not.
Pull a shawl around me.
Pander around my room, wishing for tea.
Pose as my personal fairy godmother.
Put on some tea.
Push through the last 1, 2, 3 pages.
Drifting from this wonderful place into
Sleep.
- I’m just on edge of unconsciousness.
- I’m just on the edge.
- I’ve reached the crossroad. Again.
- I reach it Every Day.
at times rejecting its challenge
at other times not.
Surpassing that which can be wonderful for that which is wondrous.
- Being immanent and transcendent.
- Embracing unknown, innovation,
- tinkering like bells
Gypsies’ bells
in no given order.
- Liberated. Autonomous. Bountiful.
- Imaginative. Enlightened. Sound.
- as in body and mind.
- in belief and thought.
- of enmity and despair.
- with charity and grace.
- from apathy and levity.
- to acceptance and faith.
Washed and made whole.
I am at a crossroad.
- I look back to the wonderful
- forward to the wondrous
- prudent of the wander-ous
- and certain to the wonder.
A bell rings.
Round One.
Monday, October 24, 2011
Emotions
Self-Loathing:
I'll admit it: I need saving. I don't know if it's from the Lord type of saving, but more of the saving from the dark, carnivorous thoughts that gnaw on my soul, bit by precious bit only to spit it out because its too unsavory to swallow. I feel defective and I wish I could claw my skin off with nails infested with disease, yellowed from tar. Then sew it back on so my outer appearance reflects how ugly I feel inside.
Misery:
Lots of huffing and even more sighing. I stare down in my empty tankard-even my drink doesn't want to stick around. I haven't even got a shilling to my name, but I ask the bartender to pour another. He declines. I've already had too much of the stuff, but there's tons of room for more.
Ambivalence:
Shrugging. Stuck. Unmoving and hoping to God that this inertia doesn't last too long. I don't have the force--the fortitude--to act. And can't time just tick, tick, tick, faster so my choices are inconsequential? Everything is beuno, everything is tres mal. It's most definitely the worst of times.
Perseverance:
Just outside of my window I can see the sunrise; if I try a little harder I can hear the birds sings as they help the sun usher in a new day. It's just a matter getting up. Out of bed. 5 more minutes. All I can take is five more minutes.
Love:
TBC
I'll admit it: I need saving. I don't know if it's from the Lord type of saving, but more of the saving from the dark, carnivorous thoughts that gnaw on my soul, bit by precious bit only to spit it out because its too unsavory to swallow. I feel defective and I wish I could claw my skin off with nails infested with disease, yellowed from tar. Then sew it back on so my outer appearance reflects how ugly I feel inside.
Misery:
Lots of huffing and even more sighing. I stare down in my empty tankard-even my drink doesn't want to stick around. I haven't even got a shilling to my name, but I ask the bartender to pour another. He declines. I've already had too much of the stuff, but there's tons of room for more.
Ambivalence:
Shrugging. Stuck. Unmoving and hoping to God that this inertia doesn't last too long. I don't have the force--the fortitude--to act. And can't time just tick, tick, tick, faster so my choices are inconsequential? Everything is beuno, everything is tres mal. It's most definitely the worst of times.
Perseverance:
Just outside of my window I can see the sunrise; if I try a little harder I can hear the birds sings as they help the sun usher in a new day. It's just a matter getting up. Out of bed. 5 more minutes. All I can take is five more minutes.
Love:
TBC
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Put Your Integrity Away
I don't know, I'm feeling....malaise. But more so on the emotional plane. And like open mouth, insert foot. Tsk tsk.
No matter,
how many times can a person watch the Beyonce video for Countdown? Even though it's appropriation border-lining on thievery. Oh well, but would it have KILLed her camp to alert the original choreographer???
No, none of that.
I go to Walmart frequently and my sister likes pringles. So two days ago I went to Walmart and I got my sister some honey mustard pringles. Well, as you can imagine, I tried one. And how did it taste?
Quote:
It tastes like chicken nugget sauce!
End Quote.
I'm like a one man act or in competition about stupidity.
Ate an egg on a burger today. It tasted like breakfast.
No matter,
how many times can a person watch the Beyonce video for Countdown? Even though it's appropriation border-lining on thievery. Oh well, but would it have KILLed her camp to alert the original choreographer???
No, none of that.
I go to Walmart frequently and my sister likes pringles. So two days ago I went to Walmart and I got my sister some honey mustard pringles. Well, as you can imagine, I tried one. And how did it taste?
It tastes like chicken nugget sauce!
End Quote.
I'm like a one man act or in competition about stupidity.
Ate an egg on a burger today. It tasted like breakfast.
Monday, October 10, 2011
Ice Cream. I Scream.
I've accomplished very little today.
I'm not quite certain how it happen, but I went to bed after 5 am, got up at 7:30 am, went back to sleep at 2pm-ish. Then I thought it was Saturday and that my favorite show was on, so I woke up just in time to see it at 3:28pm, but of course, it was Sunday, so I went back to sleep at 3:30pm. Finally woke up at 7pmish to take my sister to Walmart.
Who turned 13 and got an iPad 2.
And I've been awake ever since then.
Almost got into a wreck *ultra frowny face* and spent nearly two damn hours creating that super fab icon in the top left hand corner. Clever huh? No time management too!
But I digress.
Originally I got two hours of sleep and I was NOT at my best. Every side of the bed was the wrong side when I got up. How do I mean? Well, I threw some clothes on and fell back in the bed waiting for "go time." And I was so suspicious of everyone. Literally asked each member of my family three times if they had my blue denim vest. I refused to take no for an answer/still do. But listened to some gospel music in Spanish and that made me appreciate life.
***
I'm relieved that I've nearly caught up reading. At one point, the jig was up! But I'm down by three and by golly I'm sure no cares if I read them, so I have all the time in the world. <-- Jaded much?
So I got my first "hmm" review. And while I don't want to ruminate over it, I have an obsessive personality (which is why I fic) so it can't be help.
So the review is like, "stab, stab, wound, hehe."
Then my response is, "diddle, daddle, doodle, boo who who."
But I wanted to write, "Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah." *deep breath* "Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah." *deep breath* "Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah." *deep breath* "Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah."
Except I'm thinking, "RAWR, RAWR, RAWR, RAWR, RAWR, RAWR, RAWR , RAWR, RAWR, RAWR." And those angry sounds the Sims make when they haven't had enough sleep.
I'm not quite certain how it happen, but I went to bed after 5 am, got up at 7:30 am, went back to sleep at 2pm-ish. Then I thought it was Saturday and that my favorite show was on, so I woke up just in time to see it at 3:28pm, but of course, it was Sunday, so I went back to sleep at 3:30pm. Finally woke up at 7pmish to take my sister to Walmart.
Who turned 13 and got an iPad 2.
And I've been awake ever since then.
Almost got into a wreck *ultra frowny face* and spent nearly two damn hours creating that super fab icon in the top left hand corner. Clever huh? No time management too!
But I digress.
Originally I got two hours of sleep and I was NOT at my best. Every side of the bed was the wrong side when I got up. How do I mean? Well, I threw some clothes on and fell back in the bed waiting for "go time." And I was so suspicious of everyone. Literally asked each member of my family three times if they had my blue denim vest. I refused to take no for an answer/still do. But listened to some gospel music in Spanish and that made me appreciate life.
***
I'm relieved that I've nearly caught up reading. At one point, the jig was up! But I'm down by three and by golly I'm sure no cares if I read them, so I have all the time in the world. <-- Jaded much?
So I got my first "hmm" review. And while I don't want to ruminate over it, I have an obsessive personality (which is why I fic) so it can't be help.
So the review is like, "stab, stab, wound, hehe."
Then my response is, "diddle, daddle, doodle, boo who who."
But I wanted to write, "Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah." *deep breath* "Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah." *deep breath* "Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah." *deep breath* "Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah."
Except I'm thinking, "RAWR, RAWR, RAWR, RAWR, RAWR, RAWR, RAWR , RAWR, RAWR, RAWR." And those angry sounds the Sims make when they haven't had enough sleep.
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Cupid
I went to the doctor the other day and he told me I was 5'5". Previously, I was under a near impenetrable delusion that I was 5'7". I don't know how I managed to accumulate two additional inches. Eventually, my height will reflect my reality, but I'm just not ready to be short. Aside from that, my profile is accurate.
I feel like I should qualify my statement about disliking cats...with a story. In 2008 there was small kitten TRAPPED under a garbage dumpster. And I saw him/her and I was like "I have to save this creature!" So at 11 at night, I got down on my hands and knees/laid down on the literally trashy ground and tried to coax the little guy from out of his hiding place. So I could own it. And I almost succeed, but then he scratched me; I was nervous about rabies which lead me to abandon that call of duty. And cats.
I feel like I should qualify my statement about disliking cats...with a story. In 2008 there was small kitten TRAPPED under a garbage dumpster. And I saw him/her and I was like "I have to save this creature!" So at 11 at night, I got down on my hands and knees/laid down on the literally trashy ground and tried to coax the little guy from out of his hiding place. So I could own it. And I almost succeed, but then he scratched me; I was nervous about rabies which lead me to abandon that call of duty. And cats.
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